The Three Best Gifts
The Three Best Gifts
Ever
y so often I’m asked about a favorite gift I was given at Christmas. I have a hard time answering that question—there are few tangible gifts that I can remember desperately hoping would appear under the Christmas tree, and few that I actually remember receiving. I do remember Christmases from over the years—not because of those tangible boxes with pretty wrapping paper and bows on them, but because of the really important gifts that have outlasted by far the wrapped presents.
Tradition
Growing up, we followed the typical tradition of Christmas trees, although for many years our trees were living trees, with balls of dirt that we’d disguise with a tree skirt, and after Christmas we’d plant those trees in our yard. After a few years, we had an impressive row of spruce trees separating our yard from the next—much to the dismay of a rather nosy neighbor whose view into our comings and goings was blocked.
When my own kids were young we had our own traditions. We’d decorate the tree with a growing and eclectic collection of ornaments—some were gifts from friends, some were handmade by either me, my husband, or my kids, some were just chosen as the ornament of the year that somehow represented something significant in our lives at the time.
I loved decorating the tree with the PBS Peter, Paul & Mary holiday show playing in the background. I’d sing along with all of the tunes, and ignore the eye-rolling from the rest of my family who weren’t necessarily so enamored with that well-worn video.
Another tradition for our family was making gifts for loved ones rather than just buying them. While there were plenty of store-bought gifts under the tree, the ones that I most enjoyed giving—and receiving—were the homemade gifts. My mom sewed clothes for us every year—typically in whatever color she’d fallen in love with that year. I’ve done a lot of sewing for my kids (and now grandkids) as gifts. My husband and his dad have made many gifts that called on their woodworking skills. And we’d find a way to engage the kids in creating gifts as gifts. A favorite tradition for years was having them draw pictures that I’d put into calendars for the year. Those calendars now represent a visual history of their interests and drawing skills.
Time and Togetherness
There’s no better gift to give or receive to someone you care about than the gift of time. Time to be with loved ones, and even time to yourself is incredibly renewing. What you do during that time is far less important than the fact that you take—and give–the time. This gift is closely tied to the third gift—togetherness.
Of all the traditions my family has had over the years my most lasting memories are of getting together with family over the holidays. As a child, when we lived in Connecticut, we’d make an annual journey to visit my grandparents (and others) in Georgia. Those were special times indeed. My grandparents doted on all of us, and did their fair share of spoiling us—although not so much by those tangible gifts they gave as by the love, attention, and fond memories of those visits.
Memories!
As I write this, I continue to wrack my brain trying to remember a specific gift I received as a child. I’m sure there were bikes, dolls, and any number of other trendy toys of the time, but the specifics are elusive. Instead, I remember the visits with family, and as Christmas looms this year, it’s those visits with family I am most looking forward to.
The best measure of a successful gift is the memory it makes. How often we agonize over what gift to give a loved one, and search high and low for just the right gift—when, really, the best gift we could give is a lasting memory, built on time, tradition, and togetherness.
“If I could save time in bottle,
The first thing that I’d like to do
Is to save every day till eternity passes away,
Just to spend them with you.If I could make days last forever,
If words could make wishes come true,
I’d save every day like a treasure and then
Again, I would spend them with you.”
–Jim Croce© Melissa Clark Vickers 2017
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